i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
