A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
