He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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