All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
