Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I have already put on my inside pants.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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