if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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