his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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