we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
