Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
