CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
It all started with a game of naked twister.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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