ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
