I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
