Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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