I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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