You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
