ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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