Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Randomize