You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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