He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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