She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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