Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
