Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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