he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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