My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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