I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize