Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
