I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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