If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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