Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
