I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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