She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
