his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
