But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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