...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
cat food counts as protein by the way
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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