You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
