once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
