If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
