is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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