I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Randomize
