look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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