people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
