Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
