Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
