I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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