As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
This can only be settled by a dance off.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
