considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
