If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I just sucked dick on a ferry
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