My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize