I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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