I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
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